Textbookzlolz!

Lately, I've been spending a lot of time studying... curling up with textbooks of all sorts, hoping to be inspired or at least educated. Most of the time my mind is distracted and I think of other things, like the covers of these damn books. A good new medical textbook will range anywhere from 80-200$ and so you expect quality both in and out. Never judge a book by its cover, of course, but you do anyway and have to wonder what people are thinking when they make these things. By the way, I haven't purchased any of these books, they are all in my classroom.

This is my favorite physiology book: lots of good detail and suitable organization. Physiology in general has a wide array of interesting stuff to cover, so why the hell did they choose this image to be their cover? It may have something to do with DNA, it could be an ECG... who knows?Medical biochemistry - a subject so boring they must inspire you with super-cool images and ultra-high-tech graphics reminiscent of a poor-man's Matrix. Also featuring: an inexplicably playful font for the title.

Look at this self-righteous tome! Shaped and styled after the bible, The Merck Manual tries to herald its presence with a Revelationsesque wrath. Yeah, we get it Merck, you own all the drugs in the world. "Centennial Edition" ... ooooh!
This is one of my more favorite covers. It's a surprisingly bright and cheery color for a textbook, especially for one that's so no-nonsense on the inside. I don't know why they have to claim that it's the 20th edition twice on the cover, especially one with a lame star behind it, but good on them for putting a bit of jazz in physiology.
An indispensable book in the office but a sad sight nonetheless. Featuring a color scheme chosen out of a manual entitled "Color Schemes Not To Use", with a lamely stylized stethoscope and possibly a chest.

With a picture out of an anti-abortion ad campaign, Essentials of HUMAN EMBRYOLOGY (emphasis mine) proudly declares its allegiance to mother nature... or at least Space Odyssey 2001.
Is it an anatomy textbook? Is it a coloring book? Is it a Halloween costume in a box? Look inside and find out! I think I get what they were doing... a "problem-solving" approach to looking at anatomy, so present it linearly and all divided. I get it. Still not attractive.
This is another of my favorite ugly covers. The ugly maroon-bordered, weird-blued cover features a insightless schematic of how the brain, the lungs, a cell, a pear, another thing, and half a liver all connect: linearly! You don't even need to read the book, just follow the lines and you're as good as gold.
I included this more as a joke than anything else, because come on... look at it! It doesn't even want to be taken seriously. I've never even opened it, I just included it since it was in our classroom and looks like a Highlight's magazine.
I don't know how to feel about this one. Part of me likes the minimalist, border-less approach. The thing in the middle, possibly a cell, both has a cool Lego-ness to it and an extremely lame reductionism to it. I think I'll add this cover in the good pile. I also like the sequence of authors, since it sounds like a stern teacher addressing her class, "Mims - play fair! Roitt, wake Lin. Williams! (I'm keeping an eye on you)"
I guess I should apologize for how this picture turned out - you're really missing out on some totally awesome special effects. I wouldn't know how to begin imaging DNA transcription and translation (which I assume is going on here), but I would be sure use more symmetrical shapes and colors. Seriously, it looks like Mr. Bucket threw up.
I think Nussbaum said to McInnes, "I want to use, like, an art to depict medical genetics." Willard chimed in with, "how about abstract modernism?" "No!" McInnes yelled, "save that for those damn OBGYNs... let's do something much lamer... how about Indigenous art?" "Genius!" everyone agreed, and patted themselves on the back full-heartedly. Oh, I get it... DNA looks like Man. Wow.
You know the publishers of this one were mad they couldn't include sound effects with this one. You can just imagine the "tscheeew" and other laser sounds emanating from this cover - reminiscent of an ad campaign for a graphic design technical college.
This is probably my other favorite cover. Interesting and nice colors. Cool layout. Don't like histology... don't know what the crap on the left side is, but I'm appeased.
Judging this book by the cover, you would be very surprised. The outside may make it look like the sequel to Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret, but inside it's filled with some of the most horrific pictures I've come across this year. I don't think the publisher was cool with that, so instead used this romantic cartoon instead. I'm no art critic, but I know what I hate - and I hate this cover. The faux-marble borders? Why would they want that? The font for 'Grants' is way too flashy. The centered image is okay, I guess, until you realize that that's the most useful image in the book.
You'd think that a high-quality, well-established medical dictionary wouldn't have that horrendously tacky "Special Value Package" sticker on it. You'd be wrong. Other than that, it's a nice simple, clean cover with good colors.
Look at her spirit, her style, her joie de vivre - surely she represents everything that physiology is about. Also, this isn't the only physiology book that features dancers on the cover. The thing that bugs me about this cover is that they have to exclaim twice that this is the international edition. The fact that this version is not for sale in the US (because US can get away with charging more for textbooks) is really irrelevant to physiology and please get off the cover.
Have you ever seen Pharmacology.... on weed?
Here's an unfortunate. 'Robbins' Pathology', as it's affectionately known, is one of the best books we have and an invaluable resource. I guess they must try to be magnanimous by picking such an ugly cover. Obviously borrowing the same shamed color scheme as Clinical Examination, this one further indemnifies itself with that random, undescript clip-art that they chucked in the back. Why must a leader in textbooks have a cover that looked like it was designed in the Windows 3.1 version of MSPaint, I do not know. From the garish CDrom icon to that weird 7 in '7th edition', everything about this book screams "Don't buy me!". Yet we continue to do so. I guess it is what's inside that counts.
I laugh every time I see this one. Which, considering how it's not a great book, is infrequent. The publishers were obviously oblivious as to what to put on the cover of an OBGYN book and so must have stopped in the nearest OBGYN office and took a painting off the wall, because that is exactly what this toned-down, not-subtle, modernistic piece is.