testing, testing

So I was planning on starting this post like so many others with an apology for delay. But you know what? I'm not gunna - love means never having to say you're sorry.
The only reason I'm writing now, anyway, is because I have a damn canceled dental appointment (which I suppose is what you get for scheduling an appointment with a 4th year dental student at the university... he's probably hungover and my teeth will be uncleaned for another week) and so decided to build up on backlog for you folks.
August has been a fairly decent month, as far as months go, with various ups and downs. 2 weeks ago I went up with some friends to a beach in the north. One of the guys' brother has a sweet house that's perched on top of a hill with a great view and only 10 minute walk to the beach. Even though it's "winter" I still swam 4 times, including a midnight skinnydip. At night we had a big bonfire on the beach and did something that I think all people should do - build a ridiculously dangerous firework. What my friend did was buy $30 worth of sparklers and put them together such: one handful would be taped together; another handful would be taped together and the ass-end of that handful would stick into the mouth-end of the previous one; this was done until all the sparklers were used up and we had a giant meter-long sparkler. Then, this was placed in a tube as long as the sparklers. Tube was angled on the beach and one sparkler stuck out a bit farther than the rest. Light that one and run. It was very cool, I must say - who knew sparklers could actually be exciting? It looked like the afterburner of a jet engine: it was daylight for about a second there and you could hear all the oxygen in the surrounding atmosphere being sucked into it. The tube was PVC and didn't stand a chance - it was completely gone. I suggest everyone try this.
The next night I got to go to a friend's parents' house for dinner. For those who don't live with/visit adult houses very often, you'll understand why this was exciting for me - everything is stocked! You never go to an our-age house and see matching dishes or completely full pantries and fridges, with cookies and shit just there and begging to be snacked. The best part was time-honoured tradition of raiding the liquor cabinet. They had 42 Below Feijoa Vodka which was really tasty. Plus some good wine and Stella Artois.
On Monday night was the Med Revue. I mentioned this last year - it's a big night of skits and songs, organised by a lot of students from the school. There's videos making fun of professors or, even better, puns on medical terminology. It'd be moot to try to explain it so I won't, but mind you - it was good.
The rest of the week was normal. Sadly, more and more of my time is being taken up by this horrid elephant in the room known as the USMLE (and no, it's not pronounced "you smile"). The US medical licensing examination is a multi-step test designed to equilibrate medical students throughout the US and abroad, in typical standardised-test fashion. We'll say that it's known as the hardest test in the world EVAR, but I'm just making that up. See, I'm not against checking everyone who wants to practice medicine, especially those who come from private-expensive-easy-to-get-into schools, Caribbean schools, or UQ, but this exam asks a lot of stuff that is WAY too in-depth and mostly useless for actual medical practice. Some questions are just ridiculous, as well.

35>Two young boys are playing at a daycare center. One holds a ball on top
of some blocks that the other child has placed on the floor. The second
child helps steady the blocks, then the first child lets go of the ball
, knocking the blocks down to the floor. They both watch and then repeat
the process. These children are most likely
A. 10 months old
B. 16 months old
C. 18 months old
D. 24 months old
E. 48 months old

39> A 30-year-old veterinarian on a cattle ranch presents with a 1-to-2-month
history of malaise, chills, drenching malodorous sweats, fatigue, and
weakness. He has anorexia and has lost 15 pounds. He has intermittent
fevers that range up to 103 F (39.4 C). He complains of visual blurring.
A physical examination reveals mild lymphadenopathy, petechiae, and a
cardiac murmur consistent with aortic insufficiency. What is the most
likely etiologic agent?
A. Bacillus anthracis
B. Brucella abortus
C. Coccidioides immitis
D. Erysipelothrix rhusiopathiae
E. Trichinella spiralis

18>A 5-year-old girl is brought by her parents to the emergency room
because she is complaining of stomach pain. Physical examination reveals
multiple bruises on the child's body in different stages of healing.
X-ray examination of the chest demonstrates two cracked ribs, and the
child says, "Mommy hit me." The parents deny any abuse of their
children. The physician's most appropriate response would be:
A. "I am going to call the police right now."
B. "I must report this situation to Child Protective Services right now."
C. "I need to hospitalize this child for further studies."
D. "I will bind her ribs tonight and you must promise me that you will not strike this child again."
E. "I will bind her ribs tonight and you need to bring her to the outpatient clinic in the morning."

I guess that the annoying thing is that USMLE and my university couldn't focus on more disparate things and still be known as "medicine". USMLE wants to know every bacteria, every symptom that that bacteria causes, what it looks like and what culture it grows on. It also wants the biochemical basis of every disease. UQ medicine wants clinical reasoning skills and lists of risk factors for all the major diseases, as well as some random stuff as well. UQ may be "easier" but it definitely is more logical in terms of learning what you actually should know and will use in the future. I guess the upshot of all of this is that, once I'm done with this test, I will mostly likely never have to memorize (highly) irrelevant stuff again - which is very exciting. Additionally, if I fail, then I guess I'm staying in Australia.
Last weekend was pretty good. On Friday night I got back together with my group of close discussion-friends from last year. We went out for some pizza (I think every pizza place in the world should sell pizza by the meter) and then back to my place for dessert. Saturday and Sunday I tutored a new student who's English is pretty pretty low (good) but can only meet weekend mornings (bad). Saturday night I went to a housewarming gathering (11 people does not a party make) where there was catered good Chinese food (good) but my friend's boyfriend ending up punching a different friend (good).
So what else is new? I've been watching a decent amount of the new season of Weeds and it has been pretty good, though not as good as the previous season, as well as some new Family Guys. I definitely recommend this site to all people who like watching streaming episodes of almost every TV show. I've also seen a couple movies loaned to me from a friend: My Own Private Idaho - good, a bit strange, but nice. Sexy Beast - meh. ShortBus - woah... nice but messed up, I suggest you go and see it and see what I mean.
Anyway, that's it for now. It's too cold inside my house for long typing, I'm afeared. Brisbane houses are built so be cooler than outside. This is good in summer but not so much in "winter."
Jesus, I didn't know that!1
I feel like this is probably the best thing of my blog but has been lacking lately. It's definitely not because from know on, I only encounter things that I know...
Factoid!: Vitamin C deficiency, also known as scurvy, causes poor wound healing, swollen gums, bruising, and anaemia. Once the British Empire learned this, it issued limes to all their soldiers as a way to curb this deficiency, bringing about the term "limey" for British person.
So this week we've been studying organ donation and brain death and everything and it has been quite fascinating. The ethical side is interesting in its own right (not that I understand why someone wouldn't want to donate organs, but that's a whole other thing). If someone "dies" and their cardiopulmonary function ceases, it's pretty easy to assess: no heart beat for 1 minute, no breath for 1 minute, no reaction to something painful. However, brain death is a bit more tricky to diagnose because the person's "body" still goes on (with a lot of medical assistance) and so it's a bit more intricate to find out. There are 12 main nerves that are responsible for most of the sensation (regular and special) and motion of the face and they all have to be checked, this entails: painful pressure all over the face, checking pupils (they will be dilated with no reaction), rubbing a thin piece of cotton over the eye (most deep-coma patients will blink... no blinky = no thinky), testing gag reflex and cough reflex, and, the most interestingly, putting between 20-50ml of ice cold water into the ear (because this is, for some reason, supposed to give you nystagmus = eye shaking). Once a person is declared brain dead by 2 different specialists, then the body is very respectfully opened up and organs go to people who need them. Incidentally, heart & lungs need to be transplanted within 6 hours; liver and pancreas 12hrs; kidney 24hrs; eye, bone, heart valves can be frozen in liquid nitrogen and stored for a while.
Medical word of the post:
fecolith: (feco=shit, lith = stone) a hardened ball of feces that has been dehydrated and is now stuck somewhere in the colon. It commonly shows up on x-ray and is a typical cause of appendicitis.